Million drops of Rain

After nearly 3 years in UK, I was at garden city Bangalore, celebrating each second with friends and family, with occasional rains pleasing life. Unlike the weekdays, weekend rains are very soothing & they would also reduce the traffic a lot on roads. As like anyone who is crazy about movies and can’t sit at home even on any rainy Sunday, I was on my way to Forum mall with my friends. It was raining yet the signals made us stop so we started counting seconds, slipping down slowly, beside the red light, at Sony Centre signal at Kormangala.

Then suddenly a man popped up on the window, struggling hard to hold some 10 to 12 magazines along with news papers, in his two hands.

With my wild guess, he would be anywhere near to 60 years and his smile has totally lost in the wrinkles on his face.

I took out hundred rupee note and paid it for 2 magazines, even as I know that I do not get much time to read them sitting in car, with friends around me.

‘Do not buy unless you really want them’ said my friend.

I didn’t respond to him and buried my face surfing the photo shots in the magazines.

‘Hope you got what I mean, do not buy them as a gesture or showing sympathy on his face’, he said again.

‘Yeah, I thought to read them and moreover he is not begging on road, right?’ I replied, expecting my friend would be satisfied but he was not. He looked onto my face and said ‘do not encourage them without any reason, giving or taking sympathy is dangerous for anyone’.

‘Yeahhh, I know’ I finally submitted myself.

Being honest with myself, I want to read those but that’s not the complete truth. Slowly I moved back on seat and started to peep out again from the car window, with rain turning furious. That incident and the rain buzzing around me, brought back that one night, happened 10 years ago.

It was a rainy night and my wait for bus did not end even when clock crossed the 8pm mark. Every 9^th of any month, I spent my evening there as that’s the bus depot office where the renewals for bus pass are done. I had 90 rupees in my hand, while it would cost 85 for bus pass renewal. Since my pass was nearly tore off and wet due to rain, the officer at desk, asked me to pay 5 rupees more to issue a new pass and then stamp on it, thus indicating the renewal is done. So I paid all my money, 90 rupees and ended up with new pass in my hands.

As it was raining heavily, there were almost no lights and the streets were abandoned. I could recollect that except for just few dogs at the corner, taking shelter from the rain there was no one else. Slowly I joined them and started to look forward for the bus to come. It was almost for two hours but no signs of any bus coming there.

Out of nowhere, an old woman walked slowly into the bus stand. I wondered where she was until then, when rain was so furious out there. I was back looking at the end of road, for any signs of bus.

Suddenly I heard ‘give some money’ it was from that old lady.

For a minute, I could not believe what I was looking at. Was she asking for money, coming all the way in rain at that darkest hour?

I could not control my words but slowly said ‘no, I don’t have any money’

She looked at me but didn’t say a word, either she dnt move away. Her hand was still stretched out before me indicating to give some coins. But I had no money yet I searched to find if any coin got lucky and there at some corner in my pocket, but no.

I could not hold my looks straight into her eyes and said ‘really, I don’t have any money; I can’t give anything to you’

‘Just one rupee, please’ she said again.

She is more than 60 years, bent down almost due to weak backbone and saree that’s completely wet and struck to her body, making her shiver due to rain. I was almost broken down looking at her.

I could manage to say ‘really, I don’t have any money, you saw it, I checked all my pockets, I can’t give anything to you’

She looked as almost given up, as I was hard and harsh and didn’t helped her. Then she slowly gathered her feet together and sat down on bench, along with me.

For next few minutes, I was lost and sad, hating myself for not giving any relief to her. I hardly could concentrate anymore for my bus then. So I peeped sometimes to see, what she was doing.

She noticed that and slowly she grabbed the end of her saree and started to unfold the knot. I was curious looking all that, if she had got anything to eat, saved in a knot at the end of her saree. But to my shock, a bunch of coins came out from there and she started to add the coins in her hand, to those already there. She looked at me, while doing that. Yes, I was observing all that.

Next moment, I felt so ashamed for doing that and I turned my head away from her.

It’s her hard earned money, after all. She got all the right, to keep them safe then why would I have to bother what she was doing.

A few minutes passed by and there was no sound except for few thunders. I was growing impatient to know, if she was still there or if she had left. Without anymore self questions, I turned and she was still there, all set well with her saree and leaning on the wall, waiting for the rain to end. Our looks crossed each other for those few seconds.

I didn’t understand what was happening but all to my utter surprise, she put her hand forward and this time, her palm was folded. She opened up her fingers slowly showing me few coins there.

I had no clue what was happening.

‘You can take these and go home, don’t wait for bus now’ she said showing all her care, in her eyes.

I was blown out of my mind hearing that, seeing her kindness.

With due respect, I replied ‘no, I can’t take them, it’s your money, keep them safe’

She was silent and kind of gathering all her energy into her mouth and said ‘its ok, these are now in my hand but will go off soon, they will come now to pick me and then take all these’

Hearing that, at first I didn’t realise what it was all about but slowly I got into senses and realised this world is not kind enough as like her.

I touched her hand very slowly and it was so tender and cold, folded the fingers into her palm and covered all those coins and said ‘that’s fine, it’s your money, you keep them safe else you will get into trouble’

‘What else they can trouble me now’

I hadn’t said any answer for that but showed a straight and brave face, and looked into her eyes.

‘It would all be ok’ that’s all I could manage to say.

‘hmmm’ she slowly moved to lean back completely on the bench.

I was dumb and lost for a while and failed completely to say anything.

Within few minutes, my bus came but then, I was not ready to step in. I was anxious about the old lady and curious to know, who will come to pick her up. But then I noticed, she made her move and started to walk towards the tree, behind the tea stall. In the light coming from the vehicles passing through that road, I recognised a van there and as she was walking towards it, I realised that her care takers had come. I dnt had much of time to linger around, so I got into bus and closed the glass door and slowly lost in time, watching the rain drops hitting hard, on window.

It was so lovely to see the water dropping sliding down the glass window but with vehicle honking sound, I realised that we reached Forum mall, that incident stayed back memorable in my mind.

OLD is not GOLD, sometimes

All I hear and see in recent times, is one letter ...its 'C'

Lets start with the most awaiting of all, 'C' for Cricket...yes, winning the WC after 28 years, is long cherish moment...so that gives, 'C' for Celebration...true, its worth a celebration.

Then, 'C' for Corruption....yes, Lok Pal bill, which has been dusted for 40 years on Parliament desks, is now everywhere...including FB, Twitter...!!

And that sudden buzz has become too much to handle for 'C', now its 'C' for Congress & its alliances that as expected, govt agreed to introduce the bill in winter sessions and that's 'C' for celebration again.

Finally and hopefully, this bill will become a milestone in 'Constitution'...that's another 'C' word..Being curious, I spent sometime to understand how & when the different laws were enacted by parliament and those facts and truths are hard to read and digest.

Here below is the short list of the huge pile of laws...do you know all this? give a try.........

1946 – Industrial Employment (Standing Orders) Act
As per this policy “Provision regarding safeguards against sexual harassment of women workers at their work places”

1948 – Factories Act
This policy says:
a) Provision of crèches in every factory wherein more than 30 women workers are ordinarily employed.
b) Employment of women in factory is prohibited except between the hours of 6.00 A.M. to 7.00 P.M However, in exceptional circumstances, employment of women is permitted upto 10.00 P.M.
So if the women workers are less than 30 then no crèche would be provided?

1950 – Employee’s State Insurance (General) Regulation
As per policy “Claim for maternity benefit becomes due on the date medical certificate is issued for miscarriage, sickness arising out of pregnancy, confinement or premature birth of child”

1951 – The Plantation Labour Act
As per this policy “Provision of crèches in every plantation wherein 50 or more women workers (including women workers employed by any contractor) are employed or where the number of children of women workers (including women workers employed by any contractor) is 20 or more”

So if the women workers are less than 50 then no crèche would be provided?
Also, for children less than 20 in total, no crèche will be provided?

1961 – Maternity Benefit Act
As per this policy
1) Maternity benefits to be provided on completion of 80 days working
2) Rs.250/- as Medical bonus to be given when no prenatal confinement and post natal care is provided free of charge

So it took 11 years to design and implement the ‘maternity Benefit act’ when ‘Employee’s State Insurance (General) Regulation’ came in 1950

1966 - The Beedi & Cigar Workers (Conditions of Employment) Act
As per this policy “Provision of crèches for the benefit of women workers in the industrial premises wherein more than 50 female employees are ordinarily employed”
So if the women workers are less than 50 then no crèche would be provided?

1970 - The Contract Labour (Regulation & Abolition) Act
As per this policy “Provision of crèches where 20 or more women are ordinarily employed as contract labour”
Again, if the women workers are less than 20 then no crèche would be provided?

1976 – Equal Remuneration Act
This policy enforces equal remuneration to men and women for same or similar nature of work and no discriminations allowed in recruitment for employment

Referring to ‘Industrial Employment (Standing Orders) Act’, it took 30 years to realise that women should be equally paid as like men for same nature of work.

1979 - The Inter State Migrant Workmen (Regulation of Employment & Conditions of Service) Act
As per this policy “Provision of crèches for the benefit of women workers in establishments wherein 20 or more women are ordinarily employed as migrant workers and in which employment of migrant workers is likely to continue for three months or more”
Again, if the women workers are less than 20 then no crèche would be provided?

23rd Dec 1986 – The Employment of Children Act of 1938 was cancelled and new act ‘The Child Labour (Prohibition and Regulation) was enacted by Republic of India

August 1987 – The National Policy on Child Labour contains the action plan for tackling the problem of child labour.

1988 – In pursuance of ‘National Child Labour Policy’, the ‘NCLP Scheme’ was started in 1988 to rehabilitate child labour.
As per this NCLP Scheme, Rs. 100/- per child was being disbursed every month only after the child is successfully mainstreamed into formal system of schooling. Till that period, the amount of stipend will be regularly deposited in the Bank Account of the child. The accumulated stipend amount could be handed over to the child at the time of her/his getting mainstreamed.

Question – which bank in India will allow a child to open a Bank account, when he/she is doing schooling?

1996 – The Building & Other Construction Workers (Regulation of Employment and Conditions of Service) Act
This policy says “Provision for crèches where more than 50 female construction workers are ordinarily employed”
So again, if the women workers are less than 50 then no crèche would be provided?

What's so silly is, why there is so much fuss for 'crèche'..?

Can't the govt ensure to provide a 'crèche' for women, at their work place, irrespective of how many of them are working in there........is it costly than a 2G or a IPL....

It does not end there.....here are few more...

1860 - Societies Registration Act

1964 - Central Civil Services (Contact) Rules
1968 - General Financial Rules

Surprised ?!

Please dnt be...all the above is just a copy & paste of information on INDIAN - Ministry of Labour website 'http://labour.nic.in/welcome.html' from menu "Sections/Divisions" as on 09 April 2011

So in short...all these laws are as old as the country's culture and definitely dsn't serve the purpose now..

old is not gold...sometimes....

For all your Love, on me

It’s hard to believe but it’s the same book
I love to read, every day of the week

First line in every page starts with you
I tried to know why, but I have no clue
Yet I am happy with that, because it’s YOU

So silly it ever is, but it’s true
First words I said to you, ‘excuse me’

It’s so visible, you are always so bright
To prove that, I don’t mind to fight
No surprise, defeat accepted by moon light

You stepped in and made my life, a dream
I let you go and now I melt down like cream
I wish I get tears; even they flow as a stream

No doubts to say, you just smile and my heart stops
I like when you come near as my face glows

Wish to get those mornings, with your smiles as sparks
Spend all the nights seeing stars, on river banks

To keep you forever, I don’t mind stopping all clocks
With you, life shines much better than fire works

I knew from first moment, it’s always you
But I never revealed, at the end, why I hurt you
Even when I know for sure, life is all dark without you

Now I want to be selfish and just want to gain
I wish to go back in time and bring you back again

In all my life, I love those best moments
If I wasn’t a fool, I would have got many more things

You always said, all your smiles are mine
It my fault as I left you close to your smile

Slowly I realised, your heart is as white as Lilly
I never said that to you, as I am so silly

I hate myself a lot, as I was in fear
More scared now, as you are not near

No time to loose, now I am very clear
It’s a simple fact, always you are dear

For all my love, I do not want to know the reason
You don’t believe but I love you in any season

If I ever know why do I love you so much?
I am sure to die then, can’t live knowing as such

Trust me, you are the best ever creation
I am lucky, with you, my life is a celebration

Will I ever be fine?
My life ever falls in line?
Will I be saved, with a glass of wine?
What else I get rewarded for this crime?
I don’t know how far it is, before I finish time

The power within....

“Its 50 rupees”

I was shocked hearing that but silently, I took out one and handed it over.

As I could not control anymore, ‘is that for ever?’

He didn’t say a word but his expression showed that he did not understand.

‘I mean, will that allow me to park my car till the time I leave from here or is that 50 for an hour or two?’

‘It’s for 8 hours’; he finally said what I was looking for.

Are you kidding, its 7pm now and are we gonna be here until 3am in morning.

I looked at Akhil, he couldn’t hold on to the seat anymore minute, with a smile he said, ‘Dad, can we go in soon, please’

‘Yeah, buddy, we are going on, let’s park this safe’ I said ageing with him.

All 3 of us stepped out from car, into the muddy waters, as its raining all over in Bangalore for last few days. Thank GOD, rains are still part of Bangalore.

We stepped in and occupied our seats, right at the place where it allows us to get clear and wide view of stage. Those seats are not any cushion or like the push back in PVR yet they are spacious enough; I looked around to see the crowd for the show. Not many young couples though. Yeah, who would spend their Saturday evening in a circus tent, as every one would love to be in malls. But we wanted to see the circus; it’s different than being there at Zoo. And I promised Akhil that this would be real fun, much better than watching the crazy creatures in AVATAR.

Soon, the curtains were up and a charming young lady started the welcome speech.

I hardly heard anything but could catch all her smiles. Its not so magical as Ameya’s smiles though, I looked at my wife and there she is, killing me with her smile, one more time.

I touched her hand and slowly pressed it, showing that I am always with you darling.

Suddenly there were colours all around, flashing lights and balloons everywhere. That’s clown. Not one, but a bunch of them, running all over and shaking hands with kids on the front seats. Yeah, how else can the circus be complete, without a clown?

For few minutes, they entertained everyone with their foolish acts.

Jumping, clapping and chasing each other, they did the act best. Without a doubt, they deserved a huge round of applause.

And then the most special of circus has come.

A huge dusky elephant entered the centre stage, with a man dressed in all white.

All the while, kids were excited to see how elephant could manage to stand on a wooden stool, with all four legs put together. No doubt, it’s a wild animal and the strongest of the jungle with loads of weight, so everyone was surprised at that balancing act.

It didn’t last for more than twenty minutes or so and the decent behavioural act of elephant ended, with claps and whistles in the hall.

Now it was clear in everyone’s mind then as they know what’s going to be next.

And as they were waiting, there she came.

A lion, with golden hair, big sharp teeth popping out on edges of mouth, silently walked in, with her master holding the chain tied on her neck.

Reaching the centre, it looked around for a fraction of minute and roared wildly, shaking her head in pleasure. That’s just enough for everyone to wide open the eyes and capture that event. Cameras were not allowed as that might distract the animals but we were safe as captured everything with a handy-cam.

The last act for the day, it was magician.

Yes, this was the one; I was waiting for long time.

Since my childhood days, I am so fascinated for the magicians and their acts.

Not for the reason that they are good in making things disappear but for the way they prepare their acts so meticulously that, it looks like its all really happening. My interest for magicians forced me to watch ‘The Prestige’ movie for numerous times.

Anytime, I would prefer watching a magician show than sitting at home, to watch Cricket match.

He won everyone in the audience, even with the most expected act, the pigeon getting vanished in thin air and turn out to be a big air balloon. It finally ended and everyone put their foot forward towards the exit.

I dnt know why it clicked on my mind but suddenly I was tempted to meet the magician.

Without any delay, I took Akhil and my lovely Ameya with me and reached the back stage.

As expected, we noticed that all the performers were busy washing away the make up from their faces. I dnt know it personally but I guess it would be a different feeling when someone stand in-front of mirror, put make up on face and slowly turn into different person altogether. It’s just like living a different person’s life, till the time make up is on face.

The last thing I would ever want to happen is intruding into someone’s privacy.

So I knocked on the door promptly even it was wide open, asked for excuse and when magician looked back, I said ‘sir, could you please spare few minutes time; I want to express my personal gratitude to you’.

He looked straight into my eyes for almost a minute and replied ‘if you are happy to wait for 10 minutes then please wait there on the corridor’.

I didn’t think twice and said ‘yeah, sure. We will meet rest all others by then, thanks’

We moved slowly towards the corridor and on the way, we met few other artists.

Ameya expressed how much she enjoyed their every act and we took few snaps with them all too. They were all delighted being part of us, in snaps. We thanked them enough for being so nice and allowing us to take snaps. Akhil was all smiles, as he didn’t expect that we would meet them after the show.

‘Yes, what can I do for you all?’

Hearing that, I turned back and I knew it’s the magician.

I shook hands with him and said ‘Sir, it was really a great show. We enjoyed every bit of it. All the while we knew it’s just magic but every end was so surprising as if it was happening in real’.

I could not realise if I was making any sense but I was in so much rush and excited that there was no second thought to judge my words, if I was being polite or not.

I can’t recollect what else came out of my mouth but I knew, words were rushing out from my mouth for few minutes. Then suddenly, it was silence for a while, that definitely because I stopped.

‘Ok, thanks a lot for all your kind words and gesture. Can I have few minutes of your time, if you all are not in any hurry to be at home?’

I gave a please-answer-if-you-do-not-agree look at my wife and said ‘yeah, not any problem sir’. She didn’t said anything, which I took as a yes, from her too.

With a smile, he started saying……

“I want to share a real story with you all, happened some 10 years ago, which I will explain in short so I dnt eat away all of your time. Before I became a magician, I tried enough in all other professions but failed to get satisfaction at the end of each day of work.

Then suddenly, magic struck me and I landed up in this. I had no regrets any day, even today with this profession. I knew very well in my mind and heart that, every act I do on stage is just a twist of things and its not real in any way.

May be, soon I need to start my shows saying as ‘plz do not try these at home, its not safe’.

But what’s most important anytime for me is……

He took out his wallet and pulled out a 100 rupee note from one corner in there. Then he asked me to open up my palm and placed that currency note.

‘You see this, it’s just a hundred rupee note, and there is nothing so special about that. But this is so dear and close to my heart, as this was my first pay, at the end of my first show’.

Ameya looked at me, trying to understand if I would utter a word then. It took me more than a minute to realise that what’s in my hand is most precious to him.

He continued without any delay…..

‘When I finished my first show, I could not take a step to get down from stage and was standing there patiently hearing all the applause from the crowd. To be honest, I was there until the end of last clap from the audience. That was the best moment ever happened in my life. Then I reached to the make up room and was recollecting every piece of smile I saw on audience face, during my show. And suddenly, I noticed a hand falling on my shoulder and said ‘well done, that was nice show, everyone liked it’….that was my organiser, saying that, he gave me a 100 rupee note. This is that same 100.

I could see that Magician had suddenly become emotional about that note, he paused for a while and continued again.

“I was so excited seeing that, it was like achieving a gold medal in magic competition to me. Without wasting anytime, I rushed to meet my friends and family. They were so happy for me, with my first show’s success.

A few days later, I promised to myself that on the night, I finish my 10th show, I would spend this 100 rupee note and give party to my friends.

But when I actually finished my 10th show, I realised that this 100 rupee note does not hold enough value, so I can’t use this to pay for dinner party for three of my friends.

It may be 100 rupees by the number on it and may not be powerful enough but this note is always very special to me, like this is worth a million smiles to me”.

He finished with that and was waiting to take back that note from me.

But I was standing there dumb, gazing into his eyes, as I was completely lost hearing all that. Soon, I was back in my senses and gave that 100 back.

Later, I could not say any word even as simple as a thank you.

Ameya realised my state and said ‘that’s so nice of you, Sir. It’s really a pleasure to meet you and spend al this time, you take good care’…..

All I could manage to say, in the last was ‘all the best’.

When we reached the parking, I could see just my car, standing there all alone, waiting for us. We jumped in and were back in battle, to win the place for our car on the over crowded roads.

For next few days, I troubled myself asking so many questions about why magician shared about that incident. After so many days and sleepless nights, I realised the real piece behind that 100 rupee note.

In my life, what I have now in my hand is worth a million, in future.

If I start to spend most of my time with my family, that would give me most memorable moments which when I look back, in my old age, all of them will look so beautiful.

I can choose to spend this time, working more lengthy hours at office or on office parties or on thinking how I can improve my career. That’s same like, spending the 100 rupee note on the end of first show itself.

No, I will not end my time in such way. I work enough to keep myself close to my family and save all the smiles from those happy occasions. Just like, keep the 100 safe and special.

With that, I started to focus more on Akhil, being there all the time, so he can talk anything with me, discuss all the topics which would widen the thought process.

I re-invented myself again and to be more creative on expressing my love and pamper my sweet wife, Ameya, even on silly occasions.

A few months later, on one Sunday, I was with Akhil watching the show about wild animals, on National Geographic channel. It was a show about all those wild animals in jungle, could have been shot in Africa. Both of us were glued to tv screen watching those lions, cheetahs and elephants. Ameya, sitting on the other corner was busy with her book reading.

‘Dad, isn’t these animals same like what we saw that day, at circus?’

I heard his question but didn’t understand what the intention in that question is.

‘Yeah, they are the same, but what’s your question is all about, please re-phrase it again’

Akhil gave a pause and said “Dad, this elephant shouting loudly and moving so bravely all around the places, in jungle. The elephant in that circus was so huge like this one but it was so calm and didn’t behave like it was wild animal. It even stood on a wooden stool with all her four legs on that, making a balance”.

Then I realised the depth in his question.

But before, I say out my answer, he continued again.

“That day, lion too, behaved so well and didn’t even nod her head, without her masters’ permission. But, as they show it here now, lion is so ferocious and dangerous to everyone out there in jungle. So what’s the difference, Dad?”

‘Akhil, you might have heard from your teachers, may be in some moral science that man is a social animal. The best part of humans is they are so kind with any animal and with that, even the wildest of the wild, can become a pet. That’s how you can see lion, elephant and all these animals being so soft and well behaved in circus. But that’s not the real fact, they can turn dangerous too, anytime. There were incidents happened where tigers, crocodiles attacked their masters and killed them. Its always a state of risk yet people keep trying and these things keep going’.

With that, I looked back at tv screen assuming that, my answer is well enough for him.

But Ameya got up from her place, kept the book aside and sat beside Akhil.

I was sure, she wants to add more soup there, more details so Akhil is really convinced.

To help her on that, I had put the show on mute.

I always like her sweet voice and her expressions; I die on that any day.

So without any delay, I turned myself towards her, waiting to catch her magic eyes.

‘Akhil, when you play cricket, you always want to hit the ball very hard, aiming it to go out of fence and make a sixer, right?

“Yes, I love that shot” Akhil was quick to answer.

“Yeah, I knew. Lets say, what would Sachin be thinking when he is out there on ground, facing each ball that comes at him?

“Uooh, that’s easy Mom, he aim to play it well so he can score best runs for team, no doubt”

“Yes, Akhil…that’s also called as determination. That’s the power which will keep the person going, to achieve the best results anytime. But to do that, one needs to realise the power within and never give up on that. So when you had seen the elephant standing with all four legs on one stool, it so happened because that elephant gave up on her power, gave control on her to that man. That’s same for lion too. Even if its so furious in jungle, it gave up the control on her to that man, so she acts and behaves as like her master says.

And this state is most dangerous to anyone. You can hit a ball so hard that it goes off in air like a rocket, only when you believe in yourself and does not give up so easily.

Its not just cricket, even the chess game too. Anand, the chess wizard won the recent world title again that’s because of his attitude, not to give up anytime, on any game.

It’s just not sports. In anything, when someone gives up control and surrenders to others, that’s the end of self confidence. Even when you realise the super talent within, you would not able to reach the greater heights just because you get addicted to following directions from someone else. That’s very dangerous in life. So, when you believe in yourself, go for it and run behind it, until you reach the end of it”.

I gave a pale look at both of them, as Ameya finished saying her words.

Akhil heard it all and was silent.

For a moment, I dnt realise if Akhil was happy hearing all that from his mom, but it was so clear that she wants him to know the fact that, ‘believe in yourself and be your own master’.

Milk and Curd

It's Mothers’ Day, in this year. I wonder what would be the very reason for this day, what would have made somebody thought to mark a day in a year for Mother.

I dnt care to find that story, but I am worried that on this day, I am not with that special person. That’s for various reasons and I completely own the responsibility. As I duly say to myself, many times, if there is anyone who can stop you, it’s just you. So, this again, happened as I dnt made enough plans to be with her.

Many a time, I argue with myself if I need to mark & park a day, to shower all that love and care, on her. Am I not blessed with enough time, to say in few words every day, how much she mean to me?

All those estimations and planning in my profession, taught me enough maths to steal few minutes in a day, so I can make her happy hearing to me.

That reminds me of one silly yet memorable incident happened, during my early school days.

Those were days, when I had just started my first years at school. I still remember those initial classes about numbers, colours and learning some small and key words. As I started to see too many alphabets together, I started to get lost wondering why they would be together anyways. But, that’s how words are formed, like Apple or Rainbow etc.

I was good at every damn word that’s said in class except for one word, Mathematics. I failed to say the correct spelling for that word, which made me loose the winner of all-correct answers prize. By the end of day, I was not much worried as things and friends around me, made that lose to sit back in my mind.

But, those results made my mom to suggest the simplest way, on how to say the correct spell. I can’t say for sure, if that’s the simplest ever in this world but her one suggestion made me to remember it, even today.

What she said, goes like this.

HE put MAT and MAT together, so its like MAT-HE-MAT

Imagine that, you see when HE is doing it, so you say as ‘I SEE, YES’ which is “ICS”

Now, put all of them together – MAT-HE-MAT-ICS – that’s all.

That made my life so easy as I slowly realised to ‘divide’ everything that looks complex, understand it and then put them together again.

Even a lengthy theorem was never a trouble to me, as I mastered the fact that everything in science is an amalgamation of minute pieces.

That makes me say, about my daring & dashing Dad. I always miss those evenings spent with my Dad. My life is one piece put together, by those two great humans.

As like any other school, I dnt get a chance to escape from Social Studies.Then and even now, I am curious why lessons on Wars are part of Social Studies, what’s so SOCIAL about that. Aren’t WARS an anti-social thing?

Luckily, those bloody battles made me realise what’s so bad & wrong about wars. One day, I noticed the 3 medals proudly put on display, in our showcase and I dared to put my hands on them; those are for my Dad and his name was engraved on them, honouring his brave and bold role in Indo Pak and Indo China wars.

Next day, I spread about that news to every ear in my school and then I was surprised as all most all of my teachers & staff knew my Dad and his heroics. That boosted my confidence a lot, I am proud to be an Army Man’s son.

My Dad had spent most of his evenings with me, since then. He is so good in story-telling that everything he says, looks just like happening before eyes.

He shared all the black & white days of his Army life, including the days when he and few other solders were kept inside an 10 /10 feet tunnel for 3 days and they never saw the light except for few minutes, when they (Chinz) throwed food packets inside to eat. When he was saying that incident, he was able to recollect the moment when they started to worry if ever the Indian soldiers would find them, buried in that way, under the ground.

Its not just wars, he shared many things from his life, for hours and hours. The best part I always like is about how he won my mom, how their baby-love turned into matured relationship and eventually, into marriage.

Whenever I am at home, I never get a thought to step out and meet anyone else. I love the world with my parents, around me. They are always my support for all the craziness in my life. I wonder, if ever I would have achieved anything, if they had not showed all that support.

Had I been so determined and brave to face the life, without them?

I agree, many from my generation are from different schools like boarding schools, residential etc yet they are very much successful in life. I am happy that, everyone is lucky with their own share of happiness.

But the new generation is not so lucky. Today’s kids as old as 12 are busy with touch-screen phones and chats on Facebook. Yes, we should walk as the way the world goes. Its no wrong but to what extent?

All these techie things are turning to be an escape route for parents as they get their kids to get addicted to computer world by the early 8 years old, in name of ‘kids of next generation’.

Today, we love the things in our life more than the life itself.

How many couples enjoy the sweetness of evening together?

Very few parents spend evenings with their family and if they are together, they talk nothing except for the movies, technology and cricket. Of course, studies too.

Its not any shock as television sets are put off not anytime before 11pm any night.

Thanks to ‘digital recording’ facility, no one can miss their favourite serials or cricket if they are away attending any family occasion or a friends marriage.

I love those days, when suddenly power goes off in between the Rangoli program the only show to show the latest hindi movie songs, aired every Friday evenings on DD. Those were really the golden days, where I had all the time in the world to play cricket, swim in ponds, roam and run in paddy crops, hit on bees’ camp in cashew crops, curious watching how milk extracted from buffaloes ...and many more…..

Its not just the technology that’s changing around us but our way of life too.

Are we not worried for the day, when we become complete slaves for the tech pieces around us that we stop being humans?

Very recently, its there in all news papers on why a minister from Karnataka govt was thrown out of his post but he is yet to be punished by law.

That minister was enjoying sex forcefully with his friends’ wife and that friend got the shock of his life, when he stepped into the bed-room, as he is not aware of what’s happening inside.

Usually, any husband in that situation, would turn aggressive and jump onto that guy, throw him out of that room and protect his wife from that humiliation. But I cant get any clue, what exactly made that husband to pull out his camera and take snaps, when he is standing there looking straight at his wife being sexually harassed, in his own bed-room.

Why not his reaction was impulsive and wild? How could he manage to control himself and choose to be smart and not be violent, that he managed to take out this mobile and started to take snaps, while his wife was being crushed with no mercy?

After few weeks (I wonder why they waited so long) that couple came out into media for justice and those snaps from the husbands’ mobile were out on front pages all over.

No surprise, this would go on for a while now in courts, before the law decides who is on fair side and who will sit on dark side.

That incident makes me ask, are we not aggressive in love any more?

Are we not possessive about the most important relationship in life, marriage?

Where is that one person, who can stand and support your whole life, whenever you loose strength to take one more step in Life?

Recently, I laughed madly while reading the ‘special’ case study ‘hum do aur hamare do: Us and Our Careers’ published on TOI Saturday edition. Its about the nation wide survey, sort of case-study to understand how individual careers are adding space, distance between couples. It also published about few couples who managed to control the distance between them yet able to do well in their own careers.

Are they not supposed to fight out with world and not between them? Why would they plan to control the distance between them, when they ought to kill any little distance between them.

There is one such couple, who met only for trice in last year, as both of them were busy with their careers, one in Pune and the other in Dubai.

Yet they are happy with each other as the latest tech items like video chat, regular text messages and late-night-lengthy phone calls help them, to be together.

If I were there near them, my sure question for them would be “had you both not promised to stay together, not matter whatever happens in life during your marriage ceremony?”

That makes me say, marriage is not a convenient option for social comforts.

Are we not ready for marriages any more?

So in all this latest tech jungle and being-into-next generation, had we lost that one person who will always be with you to wipe your tears?

Where is that big hearted person, who can bring down the moon for just one of your smile?

Where is that one crazy person, who believes in you blindly that no matter whatever happens, Love on you does not shrink a little.

Does that person does not exist anymore?

Does he/she does not born anymore, in these generations?

Is that person happens to be seen only in movies?

Everyday morning, when I walk into my cubicle, I make sure that I try my best to watch everyone on floor. Not because that I want to see how colourful they are on that day but only for the reason that I am here today to share my time with you all.

I am matured enough to understand, Life is not meant to live alone, for anyone. Down all these years, I lived a lot of memorable moments but all that happened only because, I choose to live with those whom I love and not with machines.

From the baby foot days, our mother supports on every shade in our Life. At some place, we meet strangers and few among them, turn into our best friends. While one person, swings our feet away and becomes life-sharing partner. But when I look around now, I wonder if we are living our Life with right balance of share & support – Love and Life mixed well.

With IT turning out to be monster in our lives, we are now attached more to text than the actions of love and affection in relationships.

While the day starts at 5.30AM to remind us that we ought to start our outer life for next 10 to 12 hours. So everyday, breakfast at office, is just an excuse to chat with friends, while we eat lunch with a person who is not a husband / wife or does not mean any relationship.

With all this, we end up spending the most valuable time of Life, the 20s and 30s with people who are complete strangers initially but slowly turn into moral / mental or few other ways of support in Life, which we know for sure that those relationships are just born for comfort and luxury, in various means and not anything else.

But, who cares?

We know, everyone is as white as like milk and tastier as like curd.

Today, we have special friends at office to kill time and close friends to talk on phone. No matter, what’s the true intimacy in such friendships is but we crave for those special attentions every day.

How else, we would be able to survive the 10-12 hours battle in office.

We are humans, after all.

Yes, we are humans but we are more customised now. We know that every truth cant be shared and every false is not a mistake.

Totally agreed that every friendship is unique in the own way, it is made. That’s the reason, why the third person can never understand the warmness shared between two friends.

Do we take marriage as one plate where this special friendship occupies the sweet corner every time?

Long long ago, I heard a line as ‘a girl is lucky if her husband is her best friend’ but I guess, there is some more to add for that as “never let your husband know about your all other best friends”

And for husbands, I heard as “the best way to win your wife’s heart is by being her best friend” which will now end as “never let your wife know that you won many more hearts, than just hers”.

No matter whatever it is about, we are now moving into deep dark world of new shades of Love. The purest emotion ‘Love’ is now the subject for reality shows to make money. Have we lost that wild passion in Love?

We are now in world where, Birthdays are celebrated between cubicle-walls and anniversaries are spent in restaurants.

We have grown so weak that we are always on hunt to find reasons so to turn them into celebrations. In all this long development, we lost the very reason of how and why the celebrations are part of life.

Will this society can ever turn back to be mature and brave again and does not spoil the true essence of Love with the social relationships?

A cloud that never rained

It’s the weekend and as usual, I made plans to meet friends at coffee day and then for a late night movie.
I got up from bed with traffic sounds buzzing on my ears, coming through window near my bed.

Thank GOD, it rained last night and I was able to catch good long sleep. I just opened my eyes a little and peeped on clock, its almost 12 in the afternoon.

What’s the big deal, it’s weekend and as I stay alone in my flat, my timings of sleep and work would never trouble anyone. Had a long warm bath (I like shower, dnt ask me why J) called for Pizza home delivery, as like any other Saturday.

Down on the sofa, in a semi-sleeping mode, with news paper on the floor, I started to turn each page, to check what’s happening in city.

Many trees were down due to winds in last night rain, its across everywhere in Bangalore.
I looked at one snap of a big tree rooted out and down on road stopping everyone going around in JP Nagar.
Suddenly, something clicked in my mind with that ‘JP Nagar’ – ooh I have to visit Kavita Aunty.

I have been postponing this since last 2 months, if I do not visit them in this week, my mom will definitely see my end, on my next trip to Hyderabad.

Got up and picked up the keys and made my bike go vrrrooom….
On the way, I bought some Apples, Flowers and sweets.

I was there at Aunty place in no time and it the air around is so good and fresh, after rain.
Knocked the door and waiting for her to greet; I know, she will definitely scold me as I am visiting them after a long time.

“Hello Aunty, how are you…..”
I just said that, showing excitement on my face.

We both walked into living room, sharing words and some taunts from her…
She brought the photo album, as its been years that I attended any occasion in family.
I turned the pages of the album and in a way tried to make some conversation in a lighter note.

Suddenly, my eyes stopped on some black & white snaps.
“Oh! It’s the college days!!” She said out of excitement.

“That’s so great, these snaps are still nice and safe” I could not resist from giving compliment on how much care she took for those snaps.
She said ‘of course, they are very special to me. Can’t get those good days back”

Ha…. why not!! I thought to myself.
Suddenly, I noticed my mom in one snap, along with 3 other friend.

“You know, your mother was the reason for this picture. She insisted to wear jeans for all of us and we went to take this snap at our friends place. We all took a copy of this each, I am sure this one should also be with your mother”.

“Yeah…. may be, but I had not seen”
Then I started to move around the place, so many things have changed since my last visit.

I went inside the room which is beside the master bedroom, could not believe what’s in there in that room.
Its room full of books, stuffed in racks, with labels attached to each one, indicating the nature of the books. Just like library.I was excited to see so many books at one time and started to make my hands dirt, as I started to pull one each from each shelf.

“OOH you are here! I know you like books a lot!” Aunty came inside, searching for me.
“Yeah, can I take few of these?” I said without making any hesitation

“You can take all of them! all of them, take them home. But, on one condition”
“I agree to any of your conditions” as I know I can not make anymore delay to take them all.

“ok, you have to listen to my story and then you can take them all”.
“ok, when will you start”.
She started to laugh seeing how much I am in hurry to take them home.

The story goes like this!!! I skipped the narration, to make it short.

Once, there was a village, near seashore.
Cyclones ever rarely happened there and almost everyone there, make their livelihood by fishing.

One day a fisherman had caught a big shark and that earned a large amount of money. He earned so much that he was really confused about what he can do with that whole lot of money.He decided that he earned much and he can live life without going into the sea again, for atleast 3 or 4 months.

A week passed by.

From the next day, he started to feel so boring and loose interest on everything so he could not resist himself and he got into sea, out there on fishing, for a long time.

One fine evening, he saw a huge crowd gathered near by a boat.
He rushed to see if anything wrong had happened.
He made a way into the crowd and saw a huge shark caught by his friend. It’s very amazing; he is so surprised to see such a big shark. This is so much big than what he caught 2weeks back.

Everyone standing around expressed their joy, children shouting and whistling at the sight of the huge fish came out of the sea. The proud owner of that fish, was so happy and congratulated everyone out there.

Later that night, he thought so much about that incident and decided to start the fishing again from the next day, early than anyone else.

He tried a lot to find the better and much larger fish than his fellow mates; went far off places on
sea and sometimes he spent 3 long days, on sea hunting for a mighty fish, with all focus.

After few months, a fish which is much larger than the one he caught earlier, got into this hands.

His satisfaction has not limits, as he finally got back his confidence that he can do better; much better every time.
He then starts to set his targets as to catch a fish bigger than the last one.
For the next 5 years he makes a good progress, he bought few more boats and employed few others to help on his fishing battle. That turned into starting his own marketing agency to sell the fish thus bringing more profits. Not just money, he earned lot of good will in his community as well.

One night, his sleep was disturbed by a dream. He sees a huge cyclone hit the village and entire place and people got washed away with the sea currents.
He could not sleep well with that and that whole day did not go well for him, as that dream struck him deeply on his thoughts.
He finally decided to do something about this, calls up his friends and shares about that bizarre incident.Everyone listened to him, few laughed at hearing his dream while few expressed their surprise.

But he decided what he has to do for this; he built a huge shed at a place which is much far away from the sea shore; a place where everyone from his community can have safe cover when the sea angers on them and take away everything from them.

People laughed at his foresight and made comments about his stupidity. Friends suggested him that it’s not needed now, it’s just that he is afraid of that bad dream.
But, he listened to no one except to his conscious and went ahead to build that in next 2 months time.

Years passed by, but there was no cyclone.

A few years later, he died, passed away along with the time.
The place which was built as a safe home in the days of cyclones was never used.

Later that year, there was a huge cyclone, which took everyone by surprise. All the huts and houses near the sea shore went deep inside the water. People had no other option and everyone rushed and took shelter in the place which was built 3 years back.

Then finally, everyone thanked him, realizing how important that place is for them.

That’s the end of the story…

I was dumb struck and was just looking at her.
Not because the story had got so much moral in that, but the way she explained it, her narration and the expression on her face, added a life of reality to what I was listening.

There was silence, for 2 minutes between us.

“Ok, so I can take these books now! Right”
“Yeah! Sure why not? These all are yours”

“Ooh thanx!”
Its just the one simple word that cam out of my mouth.
I know, what I have asked from her is the treasure she cared and collected spending 20 years of her life. I should have said more words, better line and thanked her; but I was still struck with that story.

She looked at me, with a sharp look and said
“So how was the story? Did you get what I wanted you to learn out of that?”

“Yeah, I think I got that”, I got up from the chair and moved towards the hall.
She understood that I am making moves to leave now.

“Ok, what else? Why don’t you take a book and read one, till the time Akhil comes back home”
Akhil, Aunt’s only son is doing his Management PG.

“Oh….its ok. I have to meet my friends and we planned to go for movie.
I got to go now, it’s late. I will call up Akhil tomorrow and we will plan to meet some other time”

I made my move now. Walked towards the sofa and took my shoes, to make my steps.
She went inside and bought a huge box, full of chocolates.

“I kept these only for you; I know you are crazy for Chocolates”
“I love them”, took the box without waiting any second.

A box full of chocolates, all my favorite brands; it made me smile for a moment.
“But what if your friends will take these?”

I just smiled more and said nothing.
“Ok, I will allow you to take these, only when you say the name of your girl friend”

Hearing that line, I burst out laughing.
“I love these chocolates more than my girl friend; First love is first, so I will take these”
“Will call you later Aunty, take care”
I came out and wished her.

After so many weekends, its huge rain again and that reminded me about my visit to Kavita Aunty. My thoughts started to wander about the story of that fisherman.

I started to think why she said that story to me?
Is there anything more, any hidden message for me in that story?

I recollected that entire story again and that made me realize as, everyone should aim for challenges in life, as like that fisherman and only then the greater heights can be reached.
Then are the books related to the story? Is there any relation for them?

Suddenly, I realized that the fisherman is none other than me.
She had created this story to explain me how important to safe guard the things that are useful for people.
Oh God! She said that story so I can safe guard those books!

I realized, I have to put these books to good use and should not just keep them just safe in the shelves.
But how?

I will read all these books and gain the knowledge about everything.
But what is the use of that?
That knowledge would just remain with me and will end with me.

Ok, I should then create a library and lend these books to everyone so that way they are better utilized. Will this be a good utilization of the books?
I am still not clear about what should be done with all those books.I do not want my Aunty to get hurt, if when she knows that all these books are just here with me lying around in some room.

Thinking about Aunty, made me remember the chocolates.
I walked towards the refrigerator, to check if any more are still remaining.

Slowly I lost in thoughts thinking about those books, as I can not leave them without any use of them, just like a cloud that never rained.

Being Human

In a small village, there were two twin brothers who lived happily like any other one in their neighbourhood.
Once, a Saint was passing through that village and due to long journey, he and his group of disciples decided to stay in that village for some while, take some rest and start over again.
As like everyone in the village, these two twin brothers also reached there to take blessings from Saint. After long wait, their turn came up and they stood before Saint together and greeted him.
Saint said “wow, that’s great. You are twin brothers. So how is life, what news you have to share with me”?
“We are fine, doing our won things, no complaints as such”
“Ok, that’s even great. Here are my blessings, continue your journey with same spirit”…. Saint thought to himself, there is someone who is happy with life in this village….and suddenly
“Actually, we want to discuss some thoughts with you” both then opened their mind……
“Ok, go ahead. Talk to me, say what’s you want to say”
First brother said “I want my tomorrow not to be like yesterday, I want progress with each day”
Saint looked at him for a minute into his eyes and said “ok, give me your heart and I will make sure you have progress and success all the way”
Without hesitation, he took out his heart and gave it to Saint.
Then the second one said “I want my tomorrow to be more beautiful than today, I want more and more memorable things each day”
Now Saint dnt expected this, so he was very silent for a moment and said “Ok, give me you brain so I will make sure your mind always listens to your heart every moment”
He dnt had any second thoughts, took out this brain and put it into Saint’s hands.
“Ok, now you both got what you wanted and wished for. There will be no more obstacles for you both, ahead. Go and live your life”
Saint knows for sure, it’s not yet finished with them, as the two brothers still standing before him with curious looks.
“Son, say it. What’s you both want to say.”
They both looked into each other faces and said “Saint, you got both heart and brain, so we are just confused what you want in your life. What will you do now, with them?”
Saint looked at them with satisfaction and replied “I want to live like a sensible human being, that’s all. So I need both, heart and brain”
P.S. So how many sensible humans we see around us :)

My dear India

“Dad, so…we have to leave India now”………that’s the question Suhana asked SRK, on phone.

I wonder what SRK would have answered to his daughter, to bring back the cute smile on her face…..

I don’t bother if SRK intentionally shared about this conversation before media or he was badly hurt with that question that he could not control that. But he clearly knows the fact that, every word that speaks there will be played & re-played by media, world wide.

It’s not just the IPL issue or Rahul vs Mumbai issue but, there is much bigger and dangerous devils out there.

Today, identity crisis has grown up so huge that we almost forgot that we are humans.

I was born at Bangalore and when I was 6 years old, we all moved to Hyderabad. I remember all my life that’s gone by yet still I tried to re-collect if I ever had asked my mother, “why we are moving to Hyd and why cant we stay here, in Bangalore?”

No, I dnt asked any such. All the more important was, I was so excited to be in new place and as like any kid, I was so excited to be on train, so I was truly thrilled and least interested where actually I am going.

We just changed the place and started working and building new life in Hyd. That’s all and we have not changed behaving as humans, wherever we are.

But after 25 years life spent in Hyd, now I see that the there is a voice now for division of people who are naturally from Hyd and those who are not.

I heard from friends and close families that, these groups make phone calls often at odd hours, demanding for money. Because they think that we are outsiders and had earned a lot in all these years, by being and staying in their land.

Does that in other words said as rent to be paid because we used Hyd in our postal communications. I lost my nerve on hearing all that and strongly wish to see the face of that person who said that way, on phone.

I hate to say, but its fact. Today, its too suffocating to live around people who breath the air for division. And its not just one part or one piece but almost all the corners of the nation are out there protesting in some way or the other, for their own personal foolish needs.

Now, I want to re-study my social science subject to understand what exactly a state would be called. After 60 years of so called being Republic country, had the definition of ‘for the people, by the people and to the people’ had changed.

Does our administration has become so weak that people started to take religion and caste as the bigger things than the country itself.

Why are we allowing this to happen…?

So is it true that we always love the British strategy, ‘divide and rule’

I do not care to give a correct answer if some one asks me, how many states are in our country.

Why do we bother to count how many we have……….why do we put more interest to understand how much of water is staying in Karnataka and how much is released to AP.

To be honest, I am very concerned how long the country map will remain the way it is now.

Our country is so huge in size and population that there is no deficit for protests these days. Some are for the agriculture, some for their jobs and some, for the language.

In all these voices, there is one girl who is fighting since last 10 years for a change in law.

Sharmila, a poet from Manipur is doing hunger strike as she is not happy with government policy and wants a change. She started her hunger strike movement on 2nd Nov 2000 and she is still continuing that; now if you wonder how a person can be without food for 10 years and can still be alive!!!

The answer is, she was arrested on 6th Nov 2000 under section 307 of Indian Penal Code and charged with attempt to commit suicide and later, plastic tube was inserted through her nose, to pass on the fluids as her health turned weak and dangerous. Since then, she is on bed with that tube and that’s the only food she is consuming and hence living.

What’s so crazy that one poet from Manipur is doing such act, does she want a separate state for her own….?

No, it’s a little different this time; she wants to protect her state, her people.

What she wants is a re-visit on AFSPA and make changes in that Act. AFSPA is Armed Forces Special Permission Act that was made in 1958 and as per that, Indian Military are given special powers throughout North East India to:

• Arrest citizens and enter their property without warrant
• Shoot and kill anyone on mere ‘suspicion’
• Enjoy immunity against legal action

With this Act, Indian Military had killed many innocents and there are allegations that many innocent girls were raped and physically harassed just because they have “powers”

Now, is it not fair enough to change the law that was written more than 50 years back?

• But how many of Indians knew about this protest?
• How many media channels show the content about this, on prime time?
• Does any politician have ever thought to discuss on this issue?
• With DIL SE, Mani said that NE side of India is being ignored, is it true?

I pray for her health and respect her strong will power but if GOD forbidden, anything happens to her, then we certainly show to the world that we were not kind enough to save one human soul, that one beautiful soul who loved her community so much that she dared to stand and show her face to the government.

Today, if I close my eyes and think about tomorrow, that makes me very scared.

Scared because of what we would pass on to the next generation.

I know I am old enough and when I see the next generation around me, I am sad that they are being corrupted by all means. I wonder what would be the country that we would leave behind for them.

When I say, “I love my country” and a kid asks me, ‘are you sure?’……there is no mistake in that, because today when we can’t stand together enough for our country, then why would we be proud of something that’s not shared together.

If we do not show any standard of respect to the word unity then its too late to teach the next generation about the word INDIA.

Its time now to re-define....its no longer for the people, by the people and to the people but it should now be as, for the country, to the country and by the country.

Its time, we love our country, respect the fact that we all are Indians and be united to show that we care for our India.