Million drops of Rain

After nearly 3 years in UK, I was at garden city Bangalore, celebrating each second with friends and family, with occasional rains pleasing life. Unlike the weekdays, weekend rains are very soothing & they would also reduce the traffic a lot on roads. As like anyone who is crazy about movies and can’t sit at home even on any rainy Sunday, I was on my way to Forum mall with my friends. It was raining yet the signals made us stop so we started counting seconds, slipping down slowly, beside the red light, at Sony Centre signal at Kormangala.

Then suddenly a man popped up on the window, struggling hard to hold some 10 to 12 magazines along with news papers, in his two hands.

With my wild guess, he would be anywhere near to 60 years and his smile has totally lost in the wrinkles on his face.

I took out hundred rupee note and paid it for 2 magazines, even as I know that I do not get much time to read them sitting in car, with friends around me.

‘Do not buy unless you really want them’ said my friend.

I didn’t respond to him and buried my face surfing the photo shots in the magazines.

‘Hope you got what I mean, do not buy them as a gesture or showing sympathy on his face’, he said again.

‘Yeah, I thought to read them and moreover he is not begging on road, right?’ I replied, expecting my friend would be satisfied but he was not. He looked onto my face and said ‘do not encourage them without any reason, giving or taking sympathy is dangerous for anyone’.

‘Yeahhh, I know’ I finally submitted myself.

Being honest with myself, I want to read those but that’s not the complete truth. Slowly I moved back on seat and started to peep out again from the car window, with rain turning furious. That incident and the rain buzzing around me, brought back that one night, happened 10 years ago.

It was a rainy night and my wait for bus did not end even when clock crossed the 8pm mark. Every 9^th of any month, I spent my evening there as that’s the bus depot office where the renewals for bus pass are done. I had 90 rupees in my hand, while it would cost 85 for bus pass renewal. Since my pass was nearly tore off and wet due to rain, the officer at desk, asked me to pay 5 rupees more to issue a new pass and then stamp on it, thus indicating the renewal is done. So I paid all my money, 90 rupees and ended up with new pass in my hands.

As it was raining heavily, there were almost no lights and the streets were abandoned. I could recollect that except for just few dogs at the corner, taking shelter from the rain there was no one else. Slowly I joined them and started to look forward for the bus to come. It was almost for two hours but no signs of any bus coming there.

Out of nowhere, an old woman walked slowly into the bus stand. I wondered where she was until then, when rain was so furious out there. I was back looking at the end of road, for any signs of bus.

Suddenly I heard ‘give some money’ it was from that old lady.

For a minute, I could not believe what I was looking at. Was she asking for money, coming all the way in rain at that darkest hour?

I could not control my words but slowly said ‘no, I don’t have any money’

She looked at me but didn’t say a word, either she dnt move away. Her hand was still stretched out before me indicating to give some coins. But I had no money yet I searched to find if any coin got lucky and there at some corner in my pocket, but no.

I could not hold my looks straight into her eyes and said ‘really, I don’t have any money; I can’t give anything to you’

‘Just one rupee, please’ she said again.

She is more than 60 years, bent down almost due to weak backbone and saree that’s completely wet and struck to her body, making her shiver due to rain. I was almost broken down looking at her.

I could manage to say ‘really, I don’t have any money, you saw it, I checked all my pockets, I can’t give anything to you’

She looked as almost given up, as I was hard and harsh and didn’t helped her. Then she slowly gathered her feet together and sat down on bench, along with me.

For next few minutes, I was lost and sad, hating myself for not giving any relief to her. I hardly could concentrate anymore for my bus then. So I peeped sometimes to see, what she was doing.

She noticed that and slowly she grabbed the end of her saree and started to unfold the knot. I was curious looking all that, if she had got anything to eat, saved in a knot at the end of her saree. But to my shock, a bunch of coins came out from there and she started to add the coins in her hand, to those already there. She looked at me, while doing that. Yes, I was observing all that.

Next moment, I felt so ashamed for doing that and I turned my head away from her.

It’s her hard earned money, after all. She got all the right, to keep them safe then why would I have to bother what she was doing.

A few minutes passed by and there was no sound except for few thunders. I was growing impatient to know, if she was still there or if she had left. Without anymore self questions, I turned and she was still there, all set well with her saree and leaning on the wall, waiting for the rain to end. Our looks crossed each other for those few seconds.

I didn’t understand what was happening but all to my utter surprise, she put her hand forward and this time, her palm was folded. She opened up her fingers slowly showing me few coins there.

I had no clue what was happening.

‘You can take these and go home, don’t wait for bus now’ she said showing all her care, in her eyes.

I was blown out of my mind hearing that, seeing her kindness.

With due respect, I replied ‘no, I can’t take them, it’s your money, keep them safe’

She was silent and kind of gathering all her energy into her mouth and said ‘its ok, these are now in my hand but will go off soon, they will come now to pick me and then take all these’

Hearing that, at first I didn’t realise what it was all about but slowly I got into senses and realised this world is not kind enough as like her.

I touched her hand very slowly and it was so tender and cold, folded the fingers into her palm and covered all those coins and said ‘that’s fine, it’s your money, you keep them safe else you will get into trouble’

‘What else they can trouble me now’

I hadn’t said any answer for that but showed a straight and brave face, and looked into her eyes.

‘It would all be ok’ that’s all I could manage to say.

‘hmmm’ she slowly moved to lean back completely on the bench.

I was dumb and lost for a while and failed completely to say anything.

Within few minutes, my bus came but then, I was not ready to step in. I was anxious about the old lady and curious to know, who will come to pick her up. But then I noticed, she made her move and started to walk towards the tree, behind the tea stall. In the light coming from the vehicles passing through that road, I recognised a van there and as she was walking towards it, I realised that her care takers had come. I dnt had much of time to linger around, so I got into bus and closed the glass door and slowly lost in time, watching the rain drops hitting hard, on window.

It was so lovely to see the water dropping sliding down the glass window but with vehicle honking sound, I realised that we reached Forum mall, that incident stayed back memorable in my mind.